Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Starfucker's having a "rename our band" contest

So Portland's Starfucker has come to the conclusion that they have a dumb band name and they want your help to fix this! Of course, it could be argued that this should have been decided in the initial brainstorming session of possible band names. As in, the suggestion of Starfucker should have evoked the following exchange:

"Anybody else?"
"How about Starfucker?"
"Ugh. No way."
"Um, excuse me, I thought this was a brainstorming session - anything goes!"
"Um, anything except something awful like Starfucker."
"Fine. I quit the band."
"Fine! Start a solo project called Starfucker! We'll name our band, 'Starfucker is fucking GAY!'"
"You guys are assholes. Fuck this band!" *storms out like a baby who has awful band name ideas*

But alas, better late than never, right? Click here, read the details, and help these dudes out. You don't even have to be that creative seeing as how hard can it be to do better than Starfucker?


nhennies said...

The saddest part is that they aren't the first (and certainly not the last) to use the name. I used to own this CD in high school:

Laura said...

Yes - but I see the Starfucker YOU are referring to was Italian, so that makes it a little more forgivable. Not better, but forgivable.

D'Anne Witkowski said...

How about Galaxy Humper? Or Black Hole Screwer? Or Planet Boots Knocker?

Laura said...

Very nice D'Anne - all three are viable contenders. Though my vote would totally go for Planet Boots Knocker.

Seniorearthcorrespondent said...

How about The Band Formerly Known As Starfucker? Or Sun Defiler? I know... Cosmic Orb Rapist! ... Stellar Cuckler? Back Door Star Slammer?
Seriously though, how about something cool like Galactic Romeo or Universal Valentino...NO?
Oh well, I guess you're on your own, but I'm sure it will all work out well in the end. GOOD LUCK! YOU GUYS ROCK!!!

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